Saturday, January 1, 2011

Resolved

I don't make New Year's Resolutions. I haven't for years. It seems so pointless. Of course I want to lose weight, organize my life and my home, get my financial situation under control and quit smoking. Oh, wait. I don't smoke. I just got caught up in the excitement of public resolutions, fueled enthusiastically by the media. Still. If I DID smoke, I bet I'd feel really bad about it this time of year.

So.

No 1/1 resolutions for me.

As a matter of fact, as a protest to the resolution warriors, I believe I will actually QUIT my gym this week rather than buying new workout clothes and vowing to go more regularly (or, you know, at all). Bask in the rebellion.

I do, however, tend to make resolutions on my birthday. I don't talk about them publicly because they're nobody's business (and also because nobody tends to ask. The media doesn't launch a mass campaign to remind one of all the things one needs to change about oneself in early September and it is therefore not on the mind of the collective public.) I am taking advantage of the public resolution season this year by re-examining and making adjustments to the birthday resolutions. Surely it cannot come as a surprise to you that someone self-centered enough to consider the anniversary of their own birth to be the start of the meaningful year feels free to play fast and loose with the rules of resolution.

So.

Re-evaluating some resolutions, but forming none.

Last year, though, I did jump on the bandwagon wherein folks were choosing a single word or concept to be their guiding resolution for the year. I must not have blogged about it, because I can't find it anywhere in my archives, but I chose 'live in the present' as the concept I wanted to dedicate myself to in 2010. How did I do, you ask? Not bad. Not perfect. The smart phone was certainly a hindrance to that goal. (But would I give it up? Maybe when you pry it from my cold dead hand.) I did find this post, and I have certainly been true to the resolutions proclaimed therein.

I've noticed a trend this year where people are choosing a single word or concept to describe the past year. Mine would not be living in the present, although I did a reasonably good job with that. Mine would be strength. This year was a very dramatic one in the Casa Howard and my strength was called upon more than I would've liked. No-one was more surprised than me to find that it was there when I needed it - and when others needed it. Turns out, it was there all along, I just hadn't noticed it because it isn't a loud, flashy, 'look at me' sort of strength. It is quiet and steady and - at the risk of sounding arrogant - rather awesome. Around mid-year, I started feeling like Maria in The Sound of Music singing I Have Confidence. It's been there all along, sure, but I just discovered it - and it's exhilarating.


Someone ought to put my likeness on a collectible plate.

Just sayin'.

This year? The year that goes to 11?


I think I'm going to concentrate on independence. I think it will suit my newfound strength nicely. I talked about learned weakness here. I no longer feel weak. It's time to put action behind the feelings. I'll let you know how it goes. (You know. If it goes well...)

So - how about you? Resolutions? Words for 2010 (I'd say "keep it clean" here, but that would only be for effect. Clean is highly overrated. Keep it real.) Words for 2011? Inquiring minds want to know. (*I* want to know!)

5 comments:

Eva Gallant said...

I like your resolution to not make any resultions! True rebellion there!

Cheryl said...

I don't resolve. I either do or don't do a thing. Like today. I'm going to a birthday party I'm not sure I want to attend. Waffle waffle. Sure, I'm going. I'm just dicking around pretending I have nothing to rush around about like showering, finding a card, figuring out a gift ~ y'know, the usual. To get there on time, I have to have all of this done in 45 minutes.

So glad to know you're a kindred soul. Kinda guessed that before I read this.

Joanna Jenkins said...

Congratulations Tammy and a great big High Five for your strength!!! You rock!

Wishing you and your wonderful family a happy, healthy and joyful 2011.

xo jj

elastamom.com said...

Good for you Tammy!!! My word for this year is "Done". Done with feeling not good enough. I'm letting it go. Done.

Pam said...

I don't make resolutions, either. Seems pointless to me. I did notice last year that bloggers were choosing a word for the year. I didn't do it, but it does intrigue me. I'm just not sure I'm that introspective. I like your words, though. Strength and independence. Those two really speak to me.