You know how you'll hear an old song and it takes you back and makes you feel all warm and gushy and young and nostalgic? That didn't happen to me tonight.
The girls have friends over. The house was loud. The hubs was frustrated with me. I wanted a beer - no, a martini - no, a margarita - no, a shot of tequila - no, a really cold shot of Jaeger. But I couldn't do any of that. Remember? The girls have friends over. Just what I want them to go home telling their parents... So no mommy juice for me. But I still needed to get out - the walls were closing in. Just for a little bit. Just for some air.
So I went to the grocery store. As you do.
As I'm shuffling through the grocery store feeling frumpy and more than just a little sorry for myself, the song "Chevy Van" is being played on the muzak. I know it's not muzak anymore, but I reserve the right to use the term anyway, because I darn well like it. Anyway. "Chevy Van". Now this is definitely not a squeeee worthy "OHMIGODILOVETHISSONG" kind of song. Although it might be a nice tune for one of those SNL skits where the stories of "the first time I heard this song, I was..." get exponentially more ridiculous and uncomfortable with each repeat of the chorus... But I digress. It was a nice little tune that came out when I was a pre-teen. I was aware of and familiar with it. That's all. But hearing it tonight at the grocery store in the mood I was in, it just made me so sad. I got that familiar hot feeling behind my eyes and I said to myself (I said) "you will not cry over a 70's country/pop song all by yourself in the middle of Kroger on a Saturday night. You. Will. Not. Now pull yourself together and head for the dairy aisle. Milk and eggs aren't going to buy themselves."
Hormones are wicked, wicked entities.
I was mourning the freedom and sweetness and beauty expressed in this song about a one-night-stand with a hitchhiker. Because I used to have tan legs and moonlight in my hair, damn it! I'm sure I did! And now I'm grocery shopping on a Saturday night AS AN OUTING!!!
Does anyone remember the Tracy Ullman video for "TheyDon'tKnow" (cleverly referenced in the title of this post) which begins with a glamorous Tracy falling in love and ends with her shuffling through the grocery store in pink fuzzy slippers, pregnant, disheveled and with a little kid or two? That was exactly how I felt.
That video ends with her looking glamorous again and driving off into the sunset with Paul McCartney, though. So there's that...
For now, though, time to "get some sleep and dream of rock and roll" (lyric - Chevy Van 1973)