Liv: There's no cereal.
Momma: There's plenty of cereal.
Liv: There's no GOOD cereal. Can we make pancakes?
Momma: No - we're out of flour.
Liv: No we're not. There's lots of flour in here.
Momma: We're out of white flour.
Momma: Sooooooo? So let's see what we can do...
I used my same old usual recipe that Liv and I love. We make pancakes together pretty often and she is a talented sous chef. She gathers all of the ingredients as I need them and puts them away as I finish with them. In lieu of white flour, we decided to use 1/2 whole wheat flour and half soy flour.
We should've known this was a mistake as soon as we saw the texture of the batter. It was - hmmmm - a bit on the firm side for pancake batter. No worries. We added a little more buttermilk. Still pretty darn firm. We added a little water. Getting closer - still a little on the glue-y side. I'd like to say that we added liquid until the correct consistency was achieved, but the truth is that we added liquid until we gave up.
The griddle was hot and I dropped the batter unto it with a spoon. When all of the pancakes had been ladled out, I licked the spoon.
Oh, give me a break. You've done it too.
It was - wretched.
I can handle a lot, but this concoction I spit right out. I never do that. I flipped the pancakes then rinsed my mouth out. Awful awful awful. And because of the glue-y texture, it just wasn't coming out. I was gonna need to brush my teeth - a LOT - to get rid of this taste. And one doesn't have the leisure to brush one's teeth when one has pancakes on the griddle.
At this point, by the way, they actually looked pretty good. But that taste was still lingering in my mouth and I wasn't going near them. I told her she could try one but didn't have to. She took one bite and offered the rest to the dog. The dog, who thinks it's a fine, fine day if she can find a pair of dirty socks or underwear to gnaw on, rejected it.
Liv: Can we go to Tim Horton's?
Momma: Yes. Yes we can.