Wednesday, June 3, 2009

School's Out

Back in the early days of my squealy fangirlhood, when I first got interested in going to concerts, the first show I really wanted to see was Alice Cooper. Mom's foot spoke hard on that one. No way, no how, not gonna happen. I hear he kills babies. (Yes, Mom. He kills babies. On stage. With no consequence other than parental disappoval. Sheesh.) The very next month I was allowed to go see my actual first concert. Nazareth. I think she might have thought it was Christian rock. I neither confirmed nor denied.

Anyway.

I have to wonder if Alice Cooper (the band or the man) had any idea how iconic the song "School's Out" would continue to be, decades after its 1972 release. I'm quite certain he couldn't have anticipated appearing in the 2004 Staple's commercial featuring the song. Funnier than Gene Simmons' Dr. Pepper commercial and even Ace Frehley's Dunkin' Donuts commercial. Suck it, KISS. Alice did it all first. And he did it all better.

Anyway.

My girls were singing "School's Out" this morning - and I'll betcha a nickle I haven't heard it for the last time, today.

And I'm a-scared.

I love my girls. I do. But that line, "Well we got no class. And we got no principles." was written, I think, specifically with them in mind.

And they're gonna be here all day. Every day. For three months.

Didn't Alice also say, "lines form on my face and hands"? (totally out of context, I know, but work with me here.)

Didn't Alice also say "only women bleed"? It's a big 'ole hormone cocktail 'round here. And now there will be no respite. For three months.

Someone hold me.

Or pour me a shot.

Or shoot me.

15 comments:

Housewife Savant said...

Alice kills babies.

Ozzy eats bat heads.

KISS stands for Knights in Satan's Service (ALL of 'em are serving the Dark Lord [not Voldemort dummie!] if you ask the dried up fundie peeps I used to hang with.)

And the lead singer of Ratt ceremoniously raped women on stage.

NOW you're messing witha... a son-of-a-b*tch.

Funny how you misspelled "principles."
Or is it?
Your girls have no principles...? No suprise, (Says the little fundie voice inside my head) what with their mom's taste in music.

Dang, I'm funny today.

Housewife Savant said...

Oh, and God helps us all. School is out indeed.

bassislife said...

I distinctly remember when I was in high school and Ozzy was coming to Philly. The rumor was that he was planning to saw the legs off a German Shepherd on stage as part of the act.

Pretty lame compared to killing babies.

Macey said...

Kiss it, KISS. Will any of these phrases get you through the summer?
"Feed my Frankenstein."
"Run my greasy fingers down your greasy spine."
Hm. Probably not. Now I'm gonna be singing that ALLL day.
: )
Macey

Unknown said...

Ah the mantra of the last day of school............and yes it's so alive still!!
Buck up.........it's here!
BTW, my first concert was The Eagles, outside, @age 14, and they were passing around the pot laden brownies...........ah the innocence of those times........and the sweet smell permeated the air too. I was not a rocker chick.....but you go girl!

Claudya Martinez said...

Boooze it up for the next 3 months!
I once saw Gene Simmons at a Denny's and I sold bath gel to Richard Simmons. They're related, right?

Gibby said...

ROFL, I was just singing that song yesterday, with emphasis on "school's out forEVAH!" Cuz, around July, I kind of feel like the kids have been home forevah. Tell you what...I'll meet you at that campsite you blogged about yesterday around midsummer. You bring the food, I'll bring the Patron and we can wallow in our "we've been spending way too much time with our kids" misery. Deal?

Grand Pooba said...

Ha! You rock! Don't be a-scared! Of course I kind say that being thousands of miles away :)

And I'm not even gonna tell ya that the first time I heard that song was on a commercial.

Anonymous said...

"I neither confirmed nor denied" -g'lord that made me laugh and remember my high school days.

You poor thing, I am pouring you a large glass of whiskey right now!

Shawna said...

Hahaha aw you'll survive just fine! I went to an all girls school, I know what you mean, though. Boys are so much easier to be around!!

Jenni said...

I am SO freaking excited for summer vacation I can't stand it. I will be the one rocking the Alice on the last day around here!

Pam said...

two words. Summer. Camp.

Dejoni said...

This reminds me that my mom threw away every concert t-shirt I ever got...Motley Crue, KISS, AC/DC...cause she thought I was going to hell.
Love this song...and now am gonna be singing it all night!
Thanks for coming by on my SITS day.
http://southernfriedmomma.com

AiringMyLaundry said...

Oh my gosh, I'm scared too. The only plus is I get to sleep in (well, sleeping in for me is 830). But then I start thinking about all the fighting and the headaches that I'll get from the fighting and I just get scared all over again...

dkWells said...

Hello...Hooray...Let the Lights Grow Dim...I'm Ready! I'm 18...18...18...18 (+34) An I STILL LIKE IT!!!

Also remember, Nazareth was spot on with "Love Hurts".

It won't be long when you wish they were still around those 3 months, trust me...and enjoy them now!

Sir Hook the Cooper of Warrick