Sunday, July 26, 2009

Did Someone Say Fabu?

Warning - cussing, cussing, and more cussing in this post. And then I cuss. A lot. If that offends you, shoo! Come back tomorrow when I'll be more my sweet temperate self. If that doesn't offend you, read on!

Ok, I've tried to be modest, but it's true. I'm fucking fabulous. At least my blog is. How do I know? Same way I know everything I know. Someone told me. In this case, two someones, specifically MzBehavin at Positively Neurotic Me and Mimi at Living in France. They are both pretty fucking fabulous, too, if you ask me.


Man, that was a lot of gratuitous fucking cussing for one of my posts! I usually try to keep the cussing minimal, for maximum impact. (On the blog, at least. I can hear the people I know in real life snickering, because in real life maximum impact is apparently something I go for a lot. A whole fucking lot.)

Anyhoodle, if I haven't already offended your virgin ears - or - er - eyes too much, the requirements of this fu - oh, forget it - it's not even fun anymore. The requirements of this award are that I share 5 current obsessions and pass it along to five other blogs with a similar level of fabulosity. I'll share my obsessions - I've got nothing to hide - but I never like singling out anyone to pass an award on to. If you're still here after all the cussing, you're fucking fabulous. If you've left me comment love, you're fucking fabulous. If you've clicked my 'follow' button, you're fucking fabulous. Take it - it's yours. Now on to the obsessions:

1. I am obsessed with the upcoming Alice in Wonderland movie. I have devoured every little morsel that has been leaked with gusto. If you've read my profile, you know that a Tim Burton/Johnny Depp/ Helena Bonham Carter project has never ever failed me. This one looks astounding. I have a very important date in March. An important date in 3-fucking D! March is so faaaaaaar!!!!!

2. I am obsessed with aging. I think about it all the time. That is sometimes as negative as it sounds and sometimes it's downright positive, but it is never far from my mind. My fucking mind, to those of you who are fabulous.

3. I am obsessed with bags. No, not beautiful, expensive purses. I can walk by Kate Spade without a glance. Coach? You have no more power over me. Ok, I did spare a quick peak at the Henri Bendel bags in a display window recently, but it was just a quick peak. I didn't, you know, touch them or smell them or anything. I'm talking about bags. Reusable shopping bags. I've spoken about this before. I don't know why I love the darn things so much, but I do. I buy them all the time. And now that festival season is upon us, a lot of folks are giving them away for free. For FREE, ya'll!!! I have big ones and small ones and some that fold up in my purse. I have some for grocery shopping and some for clothing/other shopping. I have big insulated bags for cold/frozen food. Just call me the fucking bag lady.

4. I am obsessed with yarn! Anyone who knows me knows that I'm gonna embarrass them if they go into a yarn store with me. I don't treat yarn with the restraint I offer to fine purses. I touch EVERYthing. I smell quite a lot. I smell quite a lot of YARN, is what I'm saying. I PERSONALLY smell like a subtle blend of jasmine and sandalwood with gentle rose undertones. I don't even know what the fuck that means. It just sounded like it might be a nice way to smell. Ahem. But yarn - oh, I can't get enough of it. I would write an ode to it, if I were the sort of person who could write odes. Since I can't I'll just touch it and smell it and knit, knit, knit.

5. Lastly, I am obsessed with seventies and eighties nostalgia tours. Friday begins the week of a thousand bands. It's really just seven, but seven bands in seven days - well, technically eight days - is nothing to scoff at. But it doesn't sound as cool as the week of a thousand bands. We're kicking it off next Friday with the Prodigals. Saturday, Alice Cooper! Suck it, Mom! (That was for you, E. I hope you're reading. That's my nod to Suck it Sunday!). Wednesday, Joan Jett and the B-52's and Friday, Pat Benetar, Blondie and The Donnas. That is a whole lot of late seventies early eighties goodness. I am so fucking psyched! Watch this space.

This concludes my fucking fabulous post. I hope you have a fabulous fucking day. Tomorrow I return to my regular blog voice. Hopefully. No wonder people overuse the 'f' word so much. It is way easier than actually searching for a less base word to express one's true meaning...

26 comments:

Melissa B. said...

My girls and I are going to see Blondie & Pat Benatar...on the same bill...next week. Are you f***ing jealous?

MiMi said...

Omagosh. That is effing hilarious!
I love yarn and bags and Alice in Wonderland too!
Hey, I didn't realize it doesn't come out until MARCH?! Sheesh.
You are fabulous and effing brilliant too! :)
macey

Mocha Dad said...

I'm obsessed with anything that Johnny Depp is in.

Pam said...

Congrats on your fabulous awards. I have the same problem with passing them on. I now do just what you did here. It feels a little like cheating however.

OK, now for the important question. Where the f*ck did you put eloquent Tammy, the word wonder? Let her go, you f*cking miscreant!

mzbehavin said...

You are just.... too, too, Fabu..... !!!! ( who decided that the "F" bomb was bad..... and why????)

Sandy said...

Oh, where to start?

PURSES? I almost fell into that pricey trap...my Yankee roots would cause me to explode if I paid some of those prices. So I started buying second hand on eBay. Even THAT got too rich for my budget.

ALICE COOPER? Did somebody say ALICE COOPER!!?? I'm Eighteen!! I wish.

A in W? Not so much....Johnny Depp...whoa!! Outamy way.

And I echo Pam, Who are YOU? And what the f*ck did you do with Tammy?

Cassie said...

as someone who often has potty type on her blog I am LOVING this fucking fabulous post. Did I mention that it makes me smile everytime I come over to your Fucking Fabulous blog and see my little button hangin out in your sidebar cause it does. Have a great one Tammy you made my day :o)

Ginger said...

Fuckin' A!

Your blog is fuckin' fabulous! Cheers to not being censored!

BTW, one of my claims to fame is I met Joan Jett! It was after a concert and after I had shoved my husband aside because I fell in love with her (and my badass, rockin' out, fishnet wearing self).

She was nice. I fell in a hole. She laughed. I stole a drum stick. She signed it. I'm an idiot - a badass, rockin' out, fishnet wearing idiot.. That pretty much sums up the encounter.

the girl with the pink teacup said...

Tammy, as a fellow blogger who's fond of a gratuitous 'fuck' or two, I have to tip my hat to the lovely ladies who've awarded you with this Fucking Fabulous Award! You absolutely deserve four letter word-style recognition of your fabulousness :)

I am a little unsettled by how similar our obsessions are... Alice in Wonderland is going to be so amazing that I don't know if I'll be able to hold in all the excitement for another six (!) months.

Ageing is generally something to look forward to, as far as I'm concerned, but the thought of being less mobile and more senile all at once is a little unsettling. At least I'll be too senile to care by that stage (hopefully).

And you'd make a fucking fabulous bag lady, wonderful Tammy. Totally joining you on the street!

Shannon Baskind said...

I fuckin' love you....

Kathy B! said...

Awesome award :)

You fucking deserve it!

Keeper of the Skies Wife said...

I am so obsessed with yarn and grocery bags!!! I make grocery bags out of old pillow cases!

Oh and Alice in Wonderland....It comes out on my husbands birthday!!! :)))

Congrats on the fucking award, sister!!!

Aunt Julie said...

Congrats to you! I love yarn, too, but am more into quilting. And giving aways things, too. Speaking of which, SITS sent me by and I'm having a giveaway where EVERYBODY wins, so please come on down!

thatgirlblogs said...

just grabbed your fucking button.

Brandy said...

Congratufuckinlations!

ModernMom said...

LOL That was an entertaining post!

Rosa said...

YOU are fucking fabulous, my friend. And #4 on your list of obssessions made me sit at my desk and laugh out loud while all the geeky research scientists stared at me. You fucking rock!

J.J. said...

Crap - that's funny. I think you achieved maximum impact.

Anita said...

damn! All the good reincarnations of fuck have been used!!!
you are so f*cking great! I do wonder where the real Tammy went...ha ha.
I feel much less compelled to recall the 70's and 80's, it makes my grey hairs that much more sad!

Laura Ingalls Gunn said...

I can't wait for Alice! Have a happy Monday~ I am slowly making my way through all of the comments that I so lovingly received last Thursday when I was featured on SITS. Thank you so very much for visiting me.

Gibby said...

OMG, Kathy B! said fucking! I am ROFFLMFAO right now!

And I LOVE reusable bags, too! My current fave is a canvas Trader Joe's bag. It's almost like a purse. It fucking rocks!

P.S. Congrats on the award!

Kathy B! said...

Sheesh, Gibby! How much of a goody-goody do 'ya think I am?!

Moms Fighting Fat said...

ROFLMFAO! This post was "fucking" hysterical...you're right, you do have a fabulous blog. Congrats on your awards. :-)

BTW, thanks for stopping by blog the other day!

Swine said...

Fuck. Yes.

Summer said...

I'm so obsessed with reusable bags too!!! It's weird!

Vivienne said...

Tim/Johnny/Helena + Danny Elfman music = Fab. (Although no matter what else she does, Ms. Bonham Carter will always be Lucy Honeychurch to me...)

If you can substitute "wine" for "yarn" in this post then I understand completely.

I do agree that you're f-ing fabulous though.