Run and Tell That

My mother - like many good church-going folks - relies heavily on prayer chains when faced with a crisis situation. I always looked at them more as gossip chains - a way to get the word passed around under the guise of concern rather than the titillation we associate with the back fence. The end result is the same - one is told; many are informed.

Social media is sort of like that, too.

Blogging, Facebook, Twitter - for someone like me who does not use any of those outlets to promote myself professionally, they can become gossipy as well. And just like the prayer chains - we tend to report 'acceptable' concerns. Cancer? Out of work? High risk pregnancy? Chat away publicly - there will be lots of support. Mentally ill? STD? Unwanted pregnancy? Better confine that to people you know and trust - you don't want that shiz getting out on anyone's chain, prayer or otherwise.

So it's somewhat controlled gossip.

My father had a stroke last week.

I didn't want to post too much about it - though it consumed me, so it leaked out little by little anyway - because I didn't want to present it as fodder for gossip. I also didn't want to use my family's crisis in a manner that might be considered to be exploitative.

But it made it to the prayer chains.

And I can't tell you how happy my mom was when people she hadn't informed came out of the woodwork to offer their support. Had they been informed via gossip? I guess. Sort of. It fits with Webster's definition. But it wasn't malicious, as we tend to believe gossip is. It was well-intended and well-received.

So.

With no intent towards being traditionally gossipy, I will share:

My father had a stroke, and I am afraid.

Since it happened, almost a week ago now, I have wanted to say more words at times - but they've all boiled down to that.

I'm sure I will have more words in the future.

I'm not exactly the type to suffer in silence.

I don't want to be a gossip.

But neither do I want to be afraid alone.

So many people have offered their thoughts and their prayers that I can almost literally feel the support. If you had told me that that would be possible a week ago, I would've accused you of smoking crack. You can't feel good thoughts - 'sending good thoughts' is just something people say when they don't know what else to do, right? I don't know. Maybe. But I swear I can feel the collective good thoughts of relatives and friends and friends of friends...

And it really does help.

So I'm not going to try to be quiet anymore. I'm not going to try to fend off gossip. Because gossip isn't always and necessarily bad.

My father had a stroke, and I am afraid.

Pass it on.