Monday, March 16, 2009

Housework is a Breeze With My New Maytag Appliances!

Ok, that title may be a little deceptive since I still hate housework and avoid it at all costs and live in a sty just to defy it. Screw you, housework! You're not the boss of me!

The alternate title for this post was "If it Ain't Broke, Don't Fix It (But if it IS, Get Your Ass a New One)". I liked the one I went with better because I thought it conjured up images of happy housewives in vintage ads from the 50's and 60's. And I kinda dug that. But that's all irrelevant. Here's the ridiculously mundane deal:

Tom and I were both single for a long time and we both lived in apartments until we got married in our early 30's. Neither of us ever owned a washer/dryer before that time. When we got married, Tom's stepfather had just gotten a new set and offered to let us have their old one, as it was still quite functional. We happily accepted. One less expense for newly marrieds? Yes, please.

This served us just fine for a while. If I'm not mistaken, we inherited someone else's reject a few years down the line. I may be mis-recalling the whole thing - maybe we inherited single pieces. It doesn't matter. Not important to the actual story. What is important, I guess, is that we never had a matched set, but we always had something functional. And that seemed like enough.

Our dryer had given us trouble a few times, but Tom had managed to cuss his way through manageable repairs. Then a couple months ago something went wrong with the sensor. It would still dry our clothes, it just never stopped. It dried, and dried and dried. And even when I was diligent enough to check on it in a timely manner, it was drying very slowly. But laundry is a job and it's not fun and it's not supposed to be and it was still getting done, so I saw no real benefit to bitching about it. It was what it was.

It took me three full days to get four or five loads of laundry washed, dried, and put away.

Then Tom says to me (he says), "We really need to replace that dryer, this is ridiculous." Go figure, I did not argue this point with him. And then it got even better. When he took me to look at new dryers, he asked if I wanted a washer, too. I reminded him that the washer was just fine. He said he thought I might like to have a matched set. I said that I indeed might.

So I accepted delivery of my new washer and dryer a little over a week ago, and I gotta tell ya: I might have experienced just a little bit of that ridiculous vintage housewife glee. My dryer dries faster than my washer washes. This is insane to me! Now to those of you who actually indulge in modern appliances on a regular basis, this may seem like no big deal, but for me - well - the mind wobbles. Laundry takes about one third the time it used to. And also? When I open either appliance, they sing to me. And I think that's just a real nice touch. Like birds singing to Cinderella. Or something.

Now I wonder if one of those new vacuums on a ball would get me this excited about vacuuming?


Bass Is Life said...

Let's see...

The first set given to us by Rick was a very old mis-matched set. The washer worked ok, but the dryer was noisy, didn't dry well, and required an external cabinet latch to keep the door closed. I replaced the heater element, the rollers and the belt and it kept us fine for a while, with the word "fine" being relative.

When your grandmother died, we inherited her set, which actually was a matched set. We gave our old ones to my dad to give to my step sister - though I'm not certain those pieces aren't still sitting at the side of the road somewhere between here and Portsmouth.

Our new-to-us matched set didn't stay that way for long. The washer died within a year, and we replaced with whatever we could afford at the time, which wasn't much. During the lifetime of the dryer, I replaced the heating element probably 5 times (a $60 part on that stupid machine), the thermostat and a mounting bracket. I wasn't about to sink another cent into it.

I'm glad we had the extra $$ to spend on the new set. I'm guessing now I'll have to buy you some jewelry so I'm not the guy who only buys his wife housekeeping appliances. :)

Tammy Howard said...

Wow, I didn't know waxing rhapsodic about my appliances could lead to jewelry... Have I mentioned how much I like my microwave? And dishwasher?

I was just sort of pokin' around for a new vacuum. But screw the dog hair! Bring Momma bling!

Anonymous said...

I love my Dyson and as I vaccuum contemplate making them a video of how much I love it- it is sick that I feel so about a chore I do everyday- but if you hafta clean you might as well be passionate about your weapons.
On a side note the whole blognote reminds me of the track ont eh Free to Be You and Me CD we listened to in the car the other day (long trip, ran out of cd's)- it was carol channing going on and on abotu how noone likes housework and when you see someone on TV cooking and cleaning while smiling they are lying!!!!! love that track- except when I vacuum.