Monday, February 6, 2012

Pull Yourself Together

"You look very pretty today", said the cashier at the craft store.  I turned around to see who she was talking to.  She laughed as though I was being coy.  "Wow, I'm serious.  You just have that pulled together look that I can never seem to manage myself."  It was my turn to laugh, but I didn't.  I thanked her sincerely for her compliment and left the store, walking a little bit taller than I had been when I'd walked in and grabbed a buggy - not because I had so much to buy, but because I needed something to lean on just to keep myself upright.  

Before you ask, no, I hadn't stopped at Sonic on the way to the store and fortified a limeade from a little hip flask, but the thought had crossed my mind.

I was just having a hard time holding my molecules together.

I left  the house on a quest.  I had decided that the only way I was going to keep my molecules from flying away all willy nilly until I disappeared was with a new lipstick.  Hey, don't judge until your molecules are making noise about leaving you.  Sometimes a new lipstick has magical properties.  Not always - it's not a sure thing - but it's a pretty good bet.

So I went - distraught - to the makeup counter.  "I need a new lipstick."

"Hmmmm", said the woman with the drawn on eyebrows, "Do you have a cleansing regimen?"

"Yes.  I don't need that - I just need a new lipstick."

"Well, if I know what kind of moisturizer you use, I can give you a better recommendation."  She was leading me towards a rack of lotions and potions that did not even remotely resemble lipstick.

"I really just want..."

"As you age, a good skincare regimen is so important."

"Ok.  Thank you for your time." I said, backing towards the door.

"No, no!" she said, following me, "I can help you pick out a new lipstick."

"Changed my mind.  Thanks, though."

I got in my car and she looked crestfallen.  She'd tried to upsell, like a good little sales girl, and had, instead, lost a sale that was almost certain.

The thing is, I'd left the house feeling ugly and worthless.  I wanted a little pick-me-up in the form of a new and provocatively named color with which to stain my lips. I really wasn't asking for the world.   I left her counter questioning the one aspect of my physical self that I don't actually have many complaints about.   I have freak hair, I'm fat, and I'm kind of lop-sided.  But my skin is not bad.   (It's a proven fact.  Fat don't crack.) 

Thank goodness I decided to stop in the craft store before dragging my sorry ass home.  

Thank goodness that someone told me I looked pulled together just as I was certain I was falling apart.

Thank goodness.

I don't know how I'll be able to pay this one forward, but I'm certainly going to try.


Hello Jodi said...

This was an awesome read.

And I've been wanting to try MAC lipsticks if you want a shopping partner.

Anonymous said...

This is one of my all-time favorite posts of yours. Love it.

Nancy/BLissed-Out Grandma said...

Powerful post. And good for you, accepting and acknowledging the compliment. A very positive exchange.

Unknown said...

Excellent! We never know how huge the impact of our words can be!

Unknown said...

Excellent! We never know how huge the impact of our words can be!